Things my students heard last week:
"On the other hand, if I were to throw the dodgeball at you from the bed of a Ford F-150 speeding by at 60 miles per hour, you'd call the police. Why?"
"Yes, we can call it v sub f. We can call it 'Shirley', too."
"Late to class due to speeding...didn't we cover that Monday?"
"Theoretical value for g? You must know something I don't."